Dreams Into Action EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE (EI) NEWSLETTER
Honour Your Emotions, Live the Life You Yearn For
ISSUE EIGHT, MAY, 2006
Turning over a new leaf
This year, I decided I would like to live my year by one theme. That would make it easier to remember and stay on track when life gets chaotic. The theme for this year is "Live an Optimal Life." In the first week of the new year my herbal tonic that would increase the nourishment to my nervous system arrived. A friend of mine offered an indefinite supply of vitamins and helped me create meals that had proper food combining. Also, from Monday to Friday, I started my day with a 1,000-foot climb of Cobble Hill to see a panoramic view of part of Vancouver Island near Duncan with a view that extended all the way to Mount Baker in the states and Victoria Airport. The effect of the meals were such that they did not usurp my energy after I ate them. The walk left me invigorated. The vitamins increased my memory retention. The herbal remedy gives me more energy. That was just the beginning of the year.
Every day I am reminded when I take on an activity, is this activity part of living an optimal life. If it is not, I find a way to change it.
Currently, my life is chaotic. Part of my vision of living an optimal life is to meet a potential life-long partner. And I have met someone who may be just that. We are both seeing that possibility. However, that new relationship has brought a lot with it that makes it feel chaotic. It has brought qualities that attract and qualities that repel. It has brought fitting in the activities of a new relationship as well as staying on my own path. It has brought out my shadow side that shows up in relationship that needs to be worked through - and work, it is. It has brought the effect that a new relationship in my life has on my son. It has brought the sheer excitement and hope that comes with a new relationship and the despair at the possibility of it not working out. It has brought the satisfaction that comes with filling the need to be loved and the need to love. It has brought the subtle messages that emotions bring of when to spend time alone and when to spend time together, when to show vulnerabilities to a new partner, when to honour boundaries and when to be somewhat flexible. And, it has brought our past remaining baggage up.
So the new challenge is to bring order to chaos in a way that creates an optimal life. Applying Emotional Intelligence by using the five-step RHUME™ model explained in my book (see below), particularly the Honouring Our Emotions part and all the other parts are key in developing a new healthy relationship. I have been more challenged in the last month than in the last six months to use emotional intelligence skills. Relationship is one of the best testing and growing grounds for applying emotional intelligence. I am having difficulty applying it because I am overwhelmed by positive and negative emotions or I want to be right or I get scared or I am confused or I am conflicted or I don't want to deal with it or I want my peaceful life back or I am overwhelmed. And, sometimes, I feel like a fraud because I am reacting to the emotion in the moment instead of applying my own model. Ahhh. This is where compassion for self comes in. And, I can do that.
However, having said all that, I will stay the course and continue to apply this model. If I fall off track, I get back on. And I am sure I will fall off track and continue to get back on a few times. It is worth it. I know. It has helped me overcome 30 years of chronic depression and anxiety attacks and improved all my relationships (including the one with myself.) I now have the opportunity to apply it in one of the most challenging and most rewarding relationships that life can offer, that of a significant other.
Last year, my theme was "It doesn't have to be hard and you don't have to do it alone." It allowed me to grow and develop a social network of friends and colleagues in a way I would not have done had I not laid out a theme.
Choose a theme for yourself this year. Write one or two paragraphs, then distill it down to one sentence. It will create a focus for you that keeps you feeling a sense of clarity and direction you may not otherwise have. What is it that you would like to attract this year? By creating such an intentional statement, you will attract those things into your life that will make your theme a reality and your theme will be your personal measurement tool to monitor your own progress. Go ahead. Have fun with it. It makes a difference.
I would like to know how this newsletter could better help you. What would you like me to write about here? I would like to make this newsletter more relevant to what YOU want to know about i the realm of emotions or emotional intelligence. I would also be willing to create a question and answer section where you can send your question and it will be answered in the newsletter. Other ideas? Let me know at email@example.com.
And last but not least, take a look below and at www.johannavanderpol.com to order or see more about the book, the e-mail course, the teleclass course and free articles for ways to support you in your growth in honouring your emotions so you can live the life that YOU really want.
Honour Your Emotions, Live the Life you Yearn For
Honouring Your Emotions: Why it Matters by Johanna Vanderpol
How to give yourself permission to have your emotions, recognize them as your accurate guidance system and activate their value in your life.
The definitive way to master your emotions. Addresses the gap in the emotional intelligence literature.
See the Table of Contents and some excerpts at www.johannavanderpol.com.
Order it now at www.johannavanderpol.com.
Purchase it locally at Gallowglass, Volume One or Wishes in Duncan, BC; Munro's in Victoria, BC; Banyen Books, Vancouver, BC. $19.95.
INCREASE YOUR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE: THE 21-DAY SELF-COACHING E-MAIL COURSE
Special Offer of $10 USD held over. Price goes up to $21 USD soon. Receive one lesson per day in your e-mail inbox for 21 days.
The 21-day course by e-mail on how to increase your emotional intellience day by day one small step at a time.
Experts say it takes 21 days to change a habit. What would your life be like if you could change one emotional habit that gets in your way? This is the program that lets you take one small action step every day to increase positive emotions and reduce negative emotions in your life. In this 21-day course lies the tools that allow you to take it up a notch. Live your life a little fuller, a little richer, without a lot of hard work. Change doesn't have to be hard. And all for only $10. Order today at http://johannavanderpol.com/products.asp
THE FIRST EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE GROUP COACHING TELECLASS PROGRAM
Coming this fall - send an e-mail if you are interested and I will put you on the teleclass program list.
- based on the book Honouring Your Emotions applying the revolutionary RHUME™ model of processing emotions to empower and guide your life
- A 4-week teleclass series on how to Honour Your Emotions!
- Remove negative self-talk from your life (relieve anxiety and depression, increase self-esteem, reduce stress immediately) and
- discover the message in each emotion.
- Use your true emotional messages as a built in guidance system to "live the life you yearn for."
Introductory offer: $47 CAN (regulary priced at $80).
Start applying emotional intelligence to your life without even leaving your chair.
You will be given a special phone number and password to call for the program. The only phone cost to you is your regular long-distance charges. You will be able to hear all other participants on the call. If you have never done a teleclass before, try it. It is fun and effective. To register for this program, e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org for registration instructions and the special phone number and access code.
January 16 - Cafe Matisse - The Science of Emotional Intelligence, Duncan, BC, Vancouver Island
January 21 - Camp Narnia - One-day Workshop - Emotional Intelligence & NLP - Applying the RHUME™ model, Shawnigan Lake, BC, Vancouver Island
February 20 - North Shore Writer's Association - Emotional Intelligence assists the writing process, North Vancouver
March 21 - Probus (Professional Business members), Duncan, BC, Vancouver Island
April 5 - Rotary Club - Emotional Intelligence and Your Business - Duncan, BC, Vancouver Island
April 10 - Book reading & seminar - Volume 1 Bookstore, Duncan, BC, Vancouver Island, 7:30 pm. - All welcome
Summer - various writing projects
September 23-24 - Victoria B.C. Women's Show - over 150 exhibitors, seminars, etc. - stay tuned for detail
I would appreciate any comments you have that would make this newsletter more useful for you or ways that it has helped you.
This is a permission-based email list. I do not give out your name to anyone else. Please forward this newsletter to others.
For more information on emotional intelligence, coaching, authentic happiness and calendar of workshops , go to www.johannavanderpol.com
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